On track again. Hello windy november.

Omgosh guys! With my last entry about a couple days ago I got EMAIL UPDATES ABOUT THE COMMENTS! Wooooah!!! I've never gotten that before! I'm so excited! Hahaha
This will make things so much easier! And now I feel bad because I JUST saw that I got more than on comment! Sorry for not replying!

Vitamin B is by far my favorite vitamin!
HAIR SKIN NAILS & ENERGY ! You can't go wrong with that!

Haha.

(hm, vitamin E is nice too. Good for conditioning hair and stretch marks)
I like to play doctor ad split the vitamin E capsules u can buy from the GNC and mix my own super-leave-in-conditioner.

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( This is such an angry rant. Don't even bother.  )

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Well dang. The fruit here is fuzzy. No breakfast here.

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Meal plan time. Whenever I feel an urge to eat more than i've planned ( like at work when it's slow) I distract myself with writing up elaborate meal plans. But the thing is, they're more long than elaborate bc I basically eat the same things every day. Hmm but anyway. It's that time.

It's also time to reinvent myself. I can feel a depressing slump coming over me. I'll make plans for the future and find a new clothing stlye and save a little money for fun things and serious things like school. :)

And don't worry, I'm not starving myself here at work, i've already eaten dinner. I need to stop munching at goodies after dinner. I need to be normal.

It's never normal for me. It's either binge (like 2000-2500) or starve. So this is an effort I'm making.

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Today I maintained after dinner and movie snacks. Wow. It's prolly bc I stuck to vegetables all day beforehand.

At least I'm below 130. (which is grand for me)

Lame thing of the day: I'm lighter-less and sitting here on the patio lighting on cig with the end of another. Talk about a chainsmoker. Ew.

( Food for my day )

I'm still teetering 4lbs away from my fgw. It's getting there.
On a side note, I get so sad sometimes when my bf is depressed and there is nothing i can do about it. ( I mean NOTHING. I've tried and asked) poor kid. It's definately somehing he needs to work out personally.

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Oman check it OUT! I found this website where you can plug in your ingredients that you choose at Chipotle resturant and it calculates your calories! Woooah!

I found out my fav thing there is nearing 1000 oh jeez! It's 835 yikes!

I'd have to say thy is the one resturant where I splurge. (then feel terrible about it) but still splurge.

Neway, it was a neat site.

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Okay. 422 cals today.

( TodayS. MeaL.  )

Made it down to 128 the lowest I've been in about a year and a half.
Three lbs away my first gw.
And I actually feel healthy. This is so weird. I'm not starving.

Haha this won't last long.

Today is beautiful out.
Oh ps, I think yesterday was the first day in

a long time that I wasn't obsessed with numbers. Today I'm bak to my old self, but I'm proud of myself for that.

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Today is. 130 lb day.
508 total
303 burned
205 net

(365 of those were alcohol)

I want to be a chef when I grow up. That is so backwards. But I'm trying to compile a recipe book to publish with healthy meals.
I discovered another great combination. I had it for lunch today. From what I've looked up it's about 140-200 cals. And the best part is it's filling. Imagine having a 140 cal meal and feeling great about it. THAT'S my main goal. Anyway here's the creation, I call it "First Date Fail". You'll see why when you read the ingredients. ;)

( Read more... )

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( Long confusion ED related??  )

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I really need to start sharing my meals. Restrant portions are wayyyy too huge. I never remember how big they can be

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There is nothing to say. Just that the leftover pizza was too much a temptation.

Sigh. And I wonder why there's never any food in the fridge.

Because I will eat it all if I have it in there. It's better to just have an empty fridge and be forced to go out and buy small meals when I need to. And with how broke I usually am this actually works for me.

Today, is a fast day. LAST Monday, 5days ago, I was SUPPOSED to be 125. J got really close on Sunday at 128 but then I shot up to 131. Now I'm having trouble getting bak down. Erg

I'm having my coffee and wataaahhh. Then maybe a diet coke at work. Well see how his goes.

Stay strong dears, it's Friday. :)

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Sorry for post whoring. But I really feel motivated today. I really need to plan out the next couple of days.

Today was 543. No more for today.
Tommorow is fruit and coffee and salad

I'm debating salad dressing. Depends how fat I feel. Because I will have definately "budgeted" for dressing. But hey, if I can cut corners I'm guna do it.

Sorrry, what a boring post. But if I post it publically I'll actually do it.

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So this is ridiculous. I don't need to eat. Why do humans think we need to eat a "meal"?? If I want an apple and feel satiated after, then that's that. So many people overeat because of this whole meal mentality. I'm not talking about throwing the 4 food groups out the window, but do u get what I'm saying?

Do you know how much weight I would lose if I didn't feel pressured into eating a main dish, a side, and/or a salad? Etc etc.

This is coming out all wrong. Bleh. But anyway. I always eat so healthy when I visit my fam. And not in like a "lean-nutritious-fat free" healthy. I mean, three course hearty "egg-heavy cream-blueberry bread" healthy. Erg.
One piece of French toast will keep you full till dinner.

But hey, it happens. Thankfully I got away with eating healthy this time.
(well, except for this part). Breakie: one thin slice ofblueberry bread and a coffee
Snack: coffee, black
Lunch: small salad no dressing (but with a little bit of cottage cheese and chicken tenders

Oh man. I forgot to add the honey mustard arg. Counting is all I do anymore. Its almost like OCD. It's sad when I get a thrill an get excited to hurry home and count all my calories. This is so fucked up.

So all together today ive had about 543 cals. That's a rough estimate. It's hard to count when things are homemade.

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Today: 443
Burned: 303
Net: 140

Soooo why so I still feel like grosszzilla?
Tommorow will be bettahhh

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Today i'm not weighing myself. I knew it was going to be higher than I wanted. So I've decided to restrict to cut veggies today and a lite dinner. TheN I'l weigh tommorow. I better be below 130. Jeez. I was SO close at 128 to my FirstGW of 125 just four days ago, then I messed up a couple of days ago and FLEW up to 131. it's amazing how fast one can gain. Erg.

But I'm back on track. We'll try this again, sigh.

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Erg. Today is not a good day. Food wise. Everything else, meh, sorta okay.

Tommorow is dinner at a friends. Then starts my 24 hr fast. So the next timeI can eat will be thursday at 830 which by then who's guna eat. I mite as well just go to bed and have breakfast. Making it a 36 hour fast.

Just coffee and water and diet soda. + vitamins etc etc. 4th of July was a killer.

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Arg. Gained 2lbs this crazy weekend. But had a lot of fun. It's one of those times where I don't feel yoooouuuu bad bc I known I'll be bak on track this week.

These moments are rare.

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My role model is my boyfriend. He is the most honest guy I know and the smartest. With the exception of my grandfather ;)

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